My BFF Miss P and I had a great evening. We ate some pizza. We played some pool. Also, we solved life's mysteries.
Here are the mysteries solved:
Quotes on Communication:
Me: Well, it sounds like you try to communicate verbally and he tries to communicate physically. Maybe you should talk to his penis - (with motions to match:) like a microphone - hi, [dude], can you hear me?
Miss P: Well, what's the middle ground between physical and verbal communication?
Me: Sign language?
Quotes on relationships:
Me: [The boss] and I are in almost constant contact.
Ex: ('Cause yeah, he stopped by) Sounds like you guys are dating.
Me: Umm, no. There are some things lacking.
Ex: (Describes how that is like dating).
Me: Well then I have the worst luck in dating of anyone I've ever met.
On setting goals and deadlines and not appreciating the journey:
Me: Once upon a time, there was a girl named [Miss P]. She lived happily ever after. That's a shitty story!
On appreciating the journey:
Me: So, when I do really stupid stuff or when I fail at something, I think to myself: This is fodder for memoirs! Then I blog about it and laugh.