Sunday, March 1, 2009

Some of life's mysteries: SOLVED

My BFF Miss P and I had a great evening. We ate some pizza. We played some pool. Also, we solved life's mysteries.

Here are the mysteries solved:

Quotes on Communication:

Me: Well, it sounds like you try to communicate verbally and he tries to communicate physically. Maybe you should talk to his penis - (with motions to match:) like a microphone - hi, [dude], can you hear me?

Miss P: Well, what's the middle ground between physical and verbal communication?
Me: Sign language?

Quotes on relationships:

Me: [The boss] and I are in almost constant contact.
Ex: ('Cause yeah, he stopped by) Sounds like you guys are dating.
Me: Umm, no. There are some things lacking.
Ex: (Describes how that is like dating).
Me: Well then I have the worst luck in dating of anyone I've ever met.

On setting goals and deadlines and not appreciating the journey:

Me: Once upon a time, there was a girl named [Miss P]. She lived happily ever after. That's a shitty story!

On appreciating the journey:

Me: So, when I do really stupid stuff or when I fail at something, I think to myself: This is fodder for memoirs! Then I blog about it and laugh.

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