Morton Salt Syndrome is an interesting affliction - the symptoms include long dry spells interspersed with torrential showers of... job interviews. Dates. Whatever. I suffer this disorder, but keep my chin up, without turning up my nose - it makes for an interesting face. Sort of squashed.
Today I have a job interview. Next week I expect to have an interview or two. It's kind of nice, but rather stressful at the same time. One or two interviews are for "grown up" jobs - jobs that aren't temporary or part time or worthless in the long run. One or two are for temporary transition type jobs, the type that leave the future wide open. I think it is time for me to stop floating, I'm tired of struggling. Living as a starving artist is poetic and all, and maybe it gives me something to write about, cultivates inspiration, but it is rough. It's also sort of jumbling to be doing just fine for a month or two, followed by a month or so of living on the edge of poverty - wondering if I can pay rent, knowing that I can't pay all my bills... Sigh. If I had meant to be a starving artist, I never would have spent 4 years and thousands upon thousands of dollars on a god damn college degree.
I also attended no fewer than three meetings in two days - for different organizations. I've managed to be quite involved, despite being (one of) the youngest member(s) in each group. I am working on recruitment for one group. For another group, I am not doing much of anything, but I've talked about it before, how it sometimes feels like walking on shards of glass or some such unpleasant metaphor. The other group is great too, and while I am not quite as involved, it does provide me with a lot of wonderful connections and it makes the future look bright.
Last night I had drinks and dinner with some Big D's. One of the things that makes me feel like Juneau is really where I belong is how supportive people are here. People who are older and better off than poor little me are always willing to make some small gesture, pay for a drink or dinner, pay for a membership to an organization, whatever. It makes me really feel great when people look out for me. It shows that people recognize some potential in me.
Another nice thing about the Morton Salt Syndrome is that two of the interviews I have coming up were not interviews I sought out. I had a friend get my phone number and call me to tell me about a job she thought I might do well with - especially for someone I don't know all that well, I was really happy to be thought of. The other situation, I had gone back to my old job to pick up a W2 form and decided to go say hello to the former co-workers who were in the office. One of them told his girlfriend/fiancee that I was just tending bar, so when I ran into her on my way to a meeting, she asked me to send in a resume for an internship.
It sounds silly, but with the way things have been going, I really needed to see this sort of display of faith in my abilities and my potential. All that rejection hurt, but I can see a silver lining now, perhaps it's all just fate, perhaps I'm just floating until the right job can find me.
One lazy day, Miss J and I went to the grocery store to buy toilet paper and some other random things. I was wearing my glasses, which are increasingly less effective, since they haven't been updated in about two years... I was running around and saw a wave out of the corner of my eye, I turned and waved back, smiling. Not entirely sure who it was, but judging by the basic shapes and colors, I decided it was Mr. HL. Our relationship now consists entirely of short lived and awkward conversations and waves from a distance. In any case, I darted into some aisle or another to get something and then back out into the main aisle to see the mystery waver who I decided was Mr. HL holding hands with what appeared to be a girl - based on shapes and colors, again. My heart dropped a little and I told Miss J about it in the car. She didn't actually think it was him and thought it was funny that I didn't actually know but determined it was. Actually, this anecdote isn't at all funny. It's sort of depressing. Well - there you go.
Actual funny anecdote for the road:
Miss J and I were sitting around watching a nerdy TV series on DVD when Miss J declares that she thinks she has a bone spur on her foot. I look at her foot and admit that I don't even know what a bone spur is. She looks at her foot and responds that she doesn't really know either. Then we start laughing hysterically. Was that funny? I think I might just be boring right now.
And here is something that makes me amazingly happy whenever I see it:
Meet Oceana's March calendar feature:
Is this not one of the greatest things EVER?