So, I think that the English definition of the German word Schadenfreude is: Taking pleasure in the misfortune/misery of others... something like that. I am sure this isn't the best example, but my reaction to seeing a 60% off going-out-of-business-sale sign on a local business is somewhat bittersweet.
Even though it is not entirely altruistic (the only grocery stores within walking distance just happen to be locally owned), I take pride in patronizing local businesses. I try to eat my lunch at Silverbow or Valentine's rather than Subway, I try to buy my clothing from locally owned boutiques rather than - well, I guess I could go to Gottschalk's, and I definitely only get my coffee at the local places like Heritage. I like that there are thriving small businesses, that my money is helping people in my community, and that I'm not feeding corporate giants. So, when I see a small local business shutting down due to financial hardship, I'm a little sad.
Until I see the prices lower than Walmart on everything in the store. Then I can be seen dropping a hundred bucks at a store I only rarely patronized before. Seriously though, I was like a kid in a candy store when I realized that I could get art supplies at a 60% discount. I bought brushes, paint, an exacto knife, a ruler, more paint, decorative paper, a sketchbook, ink, a quill pen, and a couple prints by a local artist. I wanted to feel sad, but I was thrilled.
Now, on many occasions I will be found out and about at the bars, hanging out with friends and drinking. Not necessarily the most productive way to spend a night, especially when my house could still use some cleaning, the laundry could use a little washing, and perhaps my bills could use some paying... Well, last night I didn't do any of these listed productive or non-productive things. Instead, I did something that has always made me happy, and that was making art! I sketched, I inked, I doodled, I painted, I crafted... I turned down hanging out with a few friends for the sake of art.
And, finally, I've decided that I've been directing my energy toward the wrong pursuits... I've been so caught up in dating and quasi-relationships and silly things like that. I stress myself out, I complicate my life, and I waste a lot of time. This isn't saying that I am going to give up on the idea of dating, but I'd rather channel my energy into art than into pursuing the menfolk in my life. If they want to spend time with me, they can give me a call... meanwhile, I'll be making comics for all my lovely readers on the internet, painting, and crafting.
I mean, seriously, fuck dating. I'm gonna be an artist.