Wednesday, June 25, 2008

I swear, I'm not listening to "Needle in the Hay" with a razor blade...

Sometimes I amaze myself with my ability to create an imaginary world of despair and drudgery and abuse of literary devices.

On one of my days working the day shift at everyone's favorite dive, I had good company. I constantly try to coerce my friends to come to the bar during the earlier hours of the day, offering company (rarely works) or stiffer drinks (sometimes works). I did manage to get Mr. L to come visit one day. I doubt I was really that great as company, though watching my exemplary patience may have been amusing. One of the daytime drunks tried to bargain with me over alcohol, tried to question my abilities as a bartender based on my hair-color (he called me blond, the outrage!), and also made some mildly inappropriate comments. Once I got off the shift, I didn't even continue hanging out with Mr. L, we parted ways so I could go change for job #2 of the day and eat a bit of lunch. I ran into Miss M on the day and had some news which brightened her day a bit, putting a much missed smile on her face.

Sometimes I try to claim that I avoid drama, that I hate drama, that I'm not the crazy bitch, things just happen to me... I am pretty sure that I ask for it. I do things that will inevitably complicate my life - I could choose not to do these things, but I suppose I prefer unnecessary stress to boredom.

I seem to have acquired a seat-mate for the evening bus ride. I think 3 times of the 9ish bus-rides I have had the same seat-mate. Two of these times we've filled the time with really pleasant and intelligent conversation. Once we get off the bus, we seem to end up in different spheres; me usually curling up with Anna Karenina and frequently dozing off. Yesterday I managed to use my awkward charms (is that an oxymoron?) to work out a ride for this morning. I asked the rather cute, younger geologist if he lived downtown (being pretty sure of it) and then asked if I could carpool, "and by carpool I mean get a ride because I don't have a car to contribute." We worked out the details in a few words and then I was joined by my seat-mate. This morning, while carpooling with the downtown geologists, I had the semi-awkward 'where do I know you' conversation with one of them, leading to me detailing the exact moment and likely what everyone was wearing. I swear, I wish I had a worse memory - I remember things so vividly sometimes that I feel like people get creeped out - or maybe I just feel that they should get creeped out.

Today I realized why I am such an unproductive, lazy bastard at work. I have no music. I sit here at this desk in this quiet office with only the whirring of my computer and the clackity-clack of the keyboard, the faint humming of office equipment, the distant ringing of phones of busy workers, the rumble of heavy machinery... no music. My mind drifts between hibernation and hallucination with the boredom I encounter. Enter data. File. Enter data. File. Update document or form. Enter data. File. etc.

Tonight I fully intend to get headphones for the out-of-date bit of metal and plastic called a first generation iPod mini. I will probably have to bring the wall plug because the battery life of this little gem is about as long as my attention span these days. That's really short - just to clarify. As the iTunes on my computer refuses to function, I'll probably be left with exactly what was on my iPod mini when I was using it at work. Elliot Smith, Iron and Wine, Of Montreal, Spoon, and various other things I dubbed appropriate to play in a customer service setting. I definitely offended a handful of the more sensitive old ladies with my musical tastes. If it weren't for the shuffle, I'd have memorized the order of those several hundred songs in the months and months I listened to it...

I can't decide yet if I should come to work tomorrow. Technically it is my day off, but as I ended up with Monday off... I might want to work a full 3 days. The decision is tough. 3am wakeup call. Sleeping in as late as I please. Making money. Spending money or at best doing absolutely nothing. There is potentially the option of hiking with Miss MO and Miss S. Tough decision here - if only I could get paid to do the things I love.

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