Friday, May 23, 2008

Fake-ation number two

I'll call it a fake-ation instead of a vacation - I'm going out of town this weekend, but not to relax... I'll be hanging out with a sorority sister tonight and then dem-conning it up Saturday and Sunday. Aw yeah. I had to pay for everything myself and I was too poor to register so I won't be doing any banquets or any such nonsense - basically I dropped hundreds of dollars to be a part of history and a part of the democratic process. Sometimes I'm crazy - I know. I'll tell you what, though: When Obama is nominated as the Dem Candidate and eventually President of the United States of America - I'll feel pretty good about it. Maybe.

Also, it'll be nice to get out of Juneau for a weekend - though less than a month ago I was gone for two weeks. Already, things are getting messy!

I've been enjoying working at the bar, though day shifts are not that lucrative. I've managed to keep busy working despite having only part time jobs. I've only been working two of the three also. I had two interviews today - one for a mine which, despite my environmentalist leanings, is my preference. It involves working three days on and four days off, allowing me free time to work my other jobs and have some fun too. Cross your fingers I get it!

I have been going out a lot, which is pretty normal for me, I guess... I went to the last Monday Night Raw and also saw the Foggy Mountain String Band perform, as well as the Wilders. The bassist for FMSB is an acquaintance of mine and I talked to her about the instrument. She said that if I wanted, I could test hers out to see if it is something I really want to do. I am pretty excited about that. Also excited because I saw one of the Gallus Bros. at the Alaskan that same night and decided I'd buy him a drink, then we danced for a few songs, which was fun. I also danced with another fellow, a friend of a friend of a friend, I guess. I think he's a really nice guy, but alas, I am not necessarily "emotionally available" these days - nor have I really been for the past few months, I guess. He is sort of the "mountain man" type that I've always imagined would be plentiful in Alaska, bearded and slightly unkempt, but not in a vagabond sort of way, just rugged. He gave me a call last night and I need to call back, but I don't really know what is going on in my "love life" so it is tempting to just put off calling. I should call tonight and tell him I'm out of town - that maybe I'll see him when I get back?

Speaking of emotional (un)availability - Mr. A got in contact and we did see each other again. He told me he missed me, which was sweet but frustrating at the same time. I'm considering telling him that he has first choice if he wants to be with me, but I can't play this hot/cold game - there are other people out there and I need to know one way or another before I can really put myself out there with other people. I need closure or commitment, I suppose. Not from everyone, just him. Other people I'd be glad to just date around, but I have decided that this relationship needs to either be a relationship or be non-existent.

We've had some nice sunny days and I've found myself hanging out with Mr. EJ more and more - he works downtown and is therefore around more often. One night we were hanging out dancing and whatnot, another afternoon we were having ice cream in the park, and other times we'll just chat. I feel like I have a really bizarre social life. I feel like I am quasi-dating multiple people, getting different things out of them, never finding one person who can fulfill all of my needs.

Stupid dating. I should have become a nun - too bad you have to be catholic, saintly, and celibate...

1 comment:

Myron Davis said...

I hope you have a GREAT weekend.

It's all about enjoying yourself!